Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Nursery Update

On Monday, my husband and I toured the hospital where the twins will be born, which was thrilling; however, we got a little bit emotional (unexpectedly so) when we walked through the NICU and saw the littlest babies.  Fatherhood has me leading more with emotion than logic nowadays.  I can't help it.  I'm certain I will need to focus to ensure I'm not an obsessive enthusiast on the day of their birth.

During the hospital tour, the most amazing nurse explained we would get our own hospital room separate from our surrogate's where we could keep the babies with us.   Or, she said, we could send the babies to the nursery and the nurses would care for them.   I immediately said my babies will be with me at all times!  My husband made fun of me for jumping in.

As noted previously, I'm going to need to focus to ensure I'm not a maniac.

To prepare for the babies arrival we have been pulling together items for the nursery.

The cribs and chest of drawers are from Dwell Studio.  The mattresses, glider and ottoman are from The Land of Nod.  The rugs are from Anthropologie.   The photograph is a print of Slim Aaron's Poolside Gossip, which was purchased from Surface View.  The rocking horse is from Restoration Hardware.

I kept the plantation shutters in the room, because the only curtains I really wanted cost more than my first car, and I wasn't sure if curtains should be in our nursery since we have the cribs against the window wall.

I finally got around to framing the original art work we purchases from Etsy; we hung it high since this will be the changing table.   One of their first lessons our children will learn about art: we look with our eyes not our hands.

I think the nursery is coming together nicely.  We still have items to add, like bedding, but that will arrive over time.

Monday, December 14, 2015

First Contact

Today, for the first time, at 23 weeks and two days I made contact with my daughter.  I held my hand against Morgan's (our surrogate's) tummy and I felt the tiniest little kick from our 1.5 pound daughter who lives on Morgan's left side!  Our daughter enjoys motion; she flips and kicks often.  Our 1.6 pound son who lives on Morgan's right side is more calm and enjoys his slumber, but Morgan said when he wants to move - he moves with intent.

Morgan informed me that we are in trouble, because the babies wake up around 2:00 AM or 3:00 AM each night.  She thinks they get hungry.  I told her she has 13 to 15 more weeks to get them in line.  I often have to tell our 6 month old Frenchie, Matt Damon, that night time is for sleeping.  Maybe she needs to tell our son and daughter that night time is for sleeping.

I asked Morgan if she was anxious about carrying twins.  She said no.  She said she would be anxious if she was bring two babies home in a few weeks.


We're bringing two babies home in a few weeks!

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Dolls Dolls Dolls

Yes, this is a real picture from my youth.  My uncle Chuck deserves the photo credit from documenting this amazing moment.

Now that I'm having a daughter, I wished I would had saved my dolls and stuffed animals, but I think I got rid of them once I realized all other boys I knew did not play with dolls.  In addition to a juice box, I'm holding my boy and girl twin newborn babies (foreshadowing?) but my favorite doll is the big one I'm holding on my right.  It was designed and weighted to feel like a real baby.

A real baby is something I will have in my hands in a few months.  Actually, I will have two real babies...good thing I spent the first seven years of my life practicing.

Sunday, November 22, 2015

Surprises Still Occur

To increase the chances of getting pregnant we performed preimplantation genetic diagnosis on our 5 day old embryos.  The main goal of this test is to identify any abnormal embryos, which would not be implanted into our surrogate.  If we implanted abnormal embryos, then nature would most likely not allow us to stay pregnant.   We wanted to get pregnant and stay pregnant; as such, we implanted two genetically normal embryos.   Another data point that arrives with the DNA testing is the gender of the embryos; we were able to select the gender of the embryos we implanted.

Through this whole process, my strong opinion has been I didn't care if we implanted boys or girls I just wanted us to implant the same gender.  As you know, we implanted two boys in July.

On Friday, during the 20 week epic anatomy sonogram where 100% of the babies are measured and analyzed we discovered we had one healthy baby boy and one healthy baby GIRL.

I was in shock.  I kept asking the tech to recheck.  I kept saying things like, could it (the boy part) be there and you not be able to see it?  I couldn't believe it.  For 20 weeks I've been the father of two baby boys. When the doctor arrived he zoomed in on a certain part and said: this is not a boy.  Oh.

The very same day we went to the OB-Gyn doctor appointment and we asked the second doctor to perform another sonogram.  She did and she said, again, this is a boy and this is a girl.  Oh.

If god exist, then maybe she's reminding us we're not in control?  I called my husband to inform him of the news, and he laughed with loads of joy.  I enjoyed hearing his excitement.  I was still in shock.  I wanted to find a third doctor to check.

Phone calls were made to our fertility doctor and he reminded us that the sex gene is the faintest gene on the test.  The determined gender is only 98% accurate.  Cells from the actual embryo are not biopsied, it's cells from the sack (whatever the embryo hatches from) and since we're not testing embryo cells the gender can be misdiagnosed.  This means our girl is in the top 2%.  She's going to rule the world - as all girls should.

On the drive home I felt guilty for feeling a sense of loss.  We had two boy names picked out.  I had already envisioned our family of two dads, two sons, two French bulldogs and one spectacular hound.  My plan was to have two sons, and then go back in a few years and get two daughters.  I had a plan.  This was not in my plan.  I avoid surprises in life.  I plan.

My husband said it best: We (he really meant me) have to learn to release our agendas.

My brother's wife, the mother of our nieces, helps me process my emotions related to fatherhood, said that as a parent I will never be in control, and this is just preparing us for that fact.

Last night at dinner my maternal aunt, and mother of three, said something similar: you don't have control as a parent.

So I needed 36 hours to pivot my thinking.  If someday in the future my baby girl reads this silliness, then I want her to know it's a joyous blessing.  I'm just needed a moment to reset my plan, and I'm insecure about my ability to raise a successful girl, since women can be very mysterious to me still.  I've got time to figure it out.  To plan.

I'm going to have a son and a daughter!  How lucky is that?  And the adventure continues!

Monday, November 16, 2015


This past weekend I was in a home with a framed tablecloth hanging on the wall as a large scale art installation in the dinning room.   The tablecloth was hand made in the 1700's by the homeowners humptenth great grandmother and passed down through the family since that time.  It was a special piece.  I enjoyed seeing the names and birth dates of the women who had cared for the item during their lifetime and then passed it along afterwards.

Seeing this epic heirloom made me think about my baby bed, which is currently sitting in my garage waiting to go back to my parents' storage building where it has rested for decades.  While my mother was pregnant with my brother her grandfather purchased the baby bed for my mother to use on his first greatgrandson.  My mother's grandfather died a few months before my brother was born.  But the baby bed is where my brother slept, I slept, and then I think it was loaned to our cousins for a few years too.

I intended to use the baby bed for my children, which is how it ended up in my house.  However, upon closer analysis - it was designed with the latest technology from 1978: a drop side crib -  I think we're going to pass on using the crib for our children.  Yes, I know my parents successfully reared two sons to adulthood and started them off in this baby bed, but my husband called it an antique death trap.

Since we're having twins my parents purchased one crib and dresser and my husband's parents purchased one crib and dresser for the nursery.  I realized the family heirloom isn't a piece of furniture, but rather it's a habit of providing the baby bed for the next generation.  I think that's equally as special.

Wednesday, November 11, 2015


It's eleven days into November and while I was playing with the dogs in the backyard we were swarmed by mosquitoes.  I couldn't believe it.  This made me angry.  Again, it's November.  I put the dogs up and sprayed the yard with mosquito killer.  All summer I had been spraying mosquito replant, but I was done with that stuff - it didn't really work very long - I was spraying the real deal killing stuff.  The whole time I was spraying I was so mad at the fact that I was still battling mosquitoes in November.

In my anger I failed to realize I would kill mosquitoes and any other insect in my backyard.  I was totally focused on exterminating mosquitoes.  As a result, unknowingly I sprayed two resting monarchs.  They were sleeping in my hedges and I hosed them down with my mosquito killing spray.
I killed the monarchs, who were undoubtedly migrating south for the winter.  

I felt bad for killing the monarch butterflies.  It's hard to celebrate the death of mosquitoes now.

I Just Finished a Marathon

I finished a (Downton Abbey season two) marathon while traveling recently.  I have a new goal in life.  I want to be Dowager Countess of Grantham.  That is all.

Monday, November 9, 2015


Via my Instagram


I'm certain as fatherhood is newly upon us there will be many new terms entering my world.  One word that's new to me in 2015 is Babymoon.  At first I thought the term was for couples who are going on trip to try to get pregnant, which wasn't relevant for us.  I was mistaken.  A babymoon is a romantic vacation taken by parents-to-be before their baby is born...or in our case before our babies are born!  We weren't thinking about a babymoon when we booked our trip, but we embraced the babymoon spirit while we were on our trip.

Some notable moments:

First,  the hotel discovered we were having twins and had champagne and cake and a "happy babymoon" note waiting for us in our room.

Second, while in the towns we were asked on three different (unrelated) situations if we were brothers.  I know the strangers asking the question are simply trying to connect with us and they mean no harm, but asking if we're brothers pisses me off enormously.  I usually snapped back by alerting the stranger that we're married.  I tried to handle the situation with empathy, but a hetero couple would never get that question, which is why it makes me cranky.  Can you imagine my brother and his wife entering a gallery and the owner asking if they are brother and sister?  I cannot.

One gallery owner felt bad after asking the question, she offered us a 20% discount on her art.  Of course, 20% off art doesn't do much to move the needle on the price closer to affordability.  Still, I accepted the offer as a token of goodwill and thanked her.

Third, one morning while we were walking on the beach we ran into a mother of two-year-old identical twin boys.  We informed her we are pregnant with twins too!  I asked her if she had any advice.  The one comment she stated is that the first year is terrible, but it also becomes a blur so you don't really remember it.  The mother told us how much more fun she's having now that her boys are two.   This advice is similar to my friend (and mother of a singleton and twins) Jenna gave us...the key with twins is to survive the first two years.  Jenna informed us that twins have a built in playmate - so they entertain themselves.  It makes it easier after the first two years.

Finally, after the desk agent checking us into our island hopping flight found out we were married, she asked if we were on our honeymoon; we informed her we're on our babymoon!  She got super excited and she hugged my husband and high-fived me.  She encouraged us to move to the island to raise our sons.  It was beautiful.

Authentic Hawaii

My husband and I just returned from a week on the island of Kauai, and if you wish to experience Hawaii at its very best, then you need to travel to Kauai.  It felt very authentic.  The island hasn't been sanitized for tourist.  It hasn't been crafted to fit a Disney or a Hollywood version of Hawaii, it's not full of polished resorts.  It's full of beautiful lush landscapes inhabited by lovely individuals.  It's real.  It's beautiful.  I'm ready to return.

Saturday, October 24, 2015

It's Raining...

Story time: It was a dark and stormy weekend in Dallas.  (No really, it was a dark and stormy weekend in Dallas.  It's been raining all week.)  Early, early Saturday morning I had the two Frenchies (Dooley & Damon) in the backyard.  I was walking around with the umbrella (ella, ella) encouraging them to "hurry up" (our command for "go pee") when all the sudden a very high pitched noise came from the sky!  Trigger, our good looking hound, darted outside from the doggie door trying to locate the sound.  As I'm scuttling to the porch I heard a significant thud from behind, when I turn around I see a rat dying on the ground under our tree .  He was clearing dying from poisoning.   Eeks!

I tried not to be helpless.  I took two of three beasts inside.  The Frenchies hadn't located Mr. Rat, but Trigger's nose picks everything up.  He located Mr. Rat.  I finally got him inside too.  With three beasts safely inside, I went to the garage to get a shovel. I was going to take care of the dying rat.  The key takeaway at this part of the story is that I tried not to be helpless.

I tried.

I am helpless.  I couldn't handle it.  I am helpless around dying wild animals with long snake-like tails.  I went inside and woke my husband up and told him the story.  (It was a dark and stormy weekend in Dallas...) A rat fell from the sky.  He's not 100% dead.  He's suffering in the rain.

My husband got out of bed...

I stayed safely in bed safely under the covers. Safely.  When my husband returned to bed I asked if Mr. Rat was still alive.  He told me not to ask any questions.  He said, "I took care of it."

And that's one of the many things I love about my husband: when I am weak he is strong.  "I took care of it." That's right!  My husband took care of it.  I guess now I need to take care of him...

Saturday, October 17, 2015

Real Mouse In the House

We live ten minutes from downtown Dallas in an area known as Lakewood, which is East Dallas and sits on the west side of White Rock Lake.  With the lake, the creeks, the hike and bike trails, and the golf course this neighborhood doesn't feel like it's ten minutes from the downtown area of the ninth largest city in the US.  This is why this neighborhood is hot.

In this environment the wildlife is more robust than a normal neighborhood.  We have coyotes (that have been known to eat pets), we have hawks (that my husband saw eat our squirrels), we have mosquito (that eat all of us).  Another creature that is in abundance is rats and mice.  We really have to stay on top of exterminating the rats and mice because before we moved into this house in April 2014, we had to repair damage in our attic created by those little guys.

Last week I was watching Dooley on the nanny camera.  Yes, my husband set up a camera so I could watch the dogs who are confined to the office while I'm at work.  On the nanny camera, I saw Dooley playing with a toy inside the office.   She was throwing it up, chasing after it, and running around with the toy.  I thought to myself adding a puppy to our household, Damon, really brought out the youthful spirit in our 5 year old Dooley.

When I got home, my husband informed me that there was a dead (big) mouse (rat?) in the office.  Yes, Dooley was playing with a my house.

This place is too wild for me. I'm going to start looking for houses 5 minutes from downtown.

Sunday, October 11, 2015

The Twins' Room

As we have safely arrived on the other side of 14 weeks, with the twins expected to enter this world between 36 and 38 weeks (mid to late March 2016) it is time to get serious about the nursery.

As I stated in this post, my inspiration is the above photo; I saw it years ago and knew when I got the chance to decorate a nursery I would pick something interesting, whimsical, and not cartoon-ish.  I'm still leading with the ideal if our sons are surrounded by a beautiful environment, then they will act in a beautiful way.

The art is hung on the walls.

The cribs and changing table are ordered from Dwell Studio.

 I'm often asked: what's your nursery theme?  I state simply: Midcentury modern!  No one seems to understand, but I will post pictures when it all comes together.

Friday, October 9, 2015

Husband Book Club

One of my favorite books is Harper Lee's To Kill A Mockingbird, and I was dumbfounded when I learned my husband has never read this great American novel.  How did he escape Texas public schools without reading this masterpiece?  I think it was required reading in both 6th and 8th grade for me.

One of my husband's favorite books is Andy Weir's The Martian, which I have not read...but I saw the movie (thumbs up!) because it is staring my youngest son's namesake, Matt Damon.

We created a book club.  I'm currently reading The Martian, and he's planning on reading To Kill a Mockingbird.  We'll regroup and discuss the merits of each book at a later date.


This week late at night on some weird hotel channel I regrettably watched a show about gruesome deaths.   The only segment in the show I watched was about a beloved African man that partied hard one night at a game reserve, passed out inside in a chair, but left the door to his bungalow open...a hyena attacked him, killed him, ate him.  Yes, it's a terrible thought.  I changed the channel.  (Don't change the channel here, keep reading...)

A few days later I learned my UBER driver was born and raised in the mountains of Ethiopia.  He was a cattle farmer and he was the last person in his family to move over to the U.S.A., which was about ten years ago.

I told him about the hyena-eating-a-man segment.  I asked him his opinion on the situation.  He stated without hesitation absolutely that happens in Africa.   He said especially during the mating season when the male hyenas are full of testosterone.  In fact, his minister was eaten by a hyena while walking between villages.

He said hyenas eat men.  Lions do not (eat men).  According to my UBER driver, people and lions have a deep connection.  When his people see a lion approach they call the elder out to perform a spiritual calling/dance directed towards the lion, which always ends with the lion walking away.  I was touched by the story he told where men and lions are connected; it is beautiful.

I asked him if he felt connected to elephants in the same way (I feel connected to elephants!) and he laughed and told me that he lived in the mountains.  Elephants do not roam mountains.  My question was ridiculous, apparently.

As my ride was ending he said that Africa is a great land and everyone must visit it at least once.  However, he claimed again without hesitation that America is the greatest country in the world.  His whole family had jobs, houses, and good lives in this country.  If he hears anyone speak negatively about America or complain about America, then he offers to buy them a plane ticket and suggests they leave.

America is the best country was the last thing he told me before I stepped out of the car.

Saturday, October 3, 2015

Noisy Neighbors

Last weekend in Austin we had to hunt to find a place to stay for Saturday night.  One night only! We finally found a room at the Sheraton in Austin.  The lobby was nice, but the rooms were dated with popcorn on the low ceilings, outdated bathroom design, the uncomfortable bed....and the thin walls.

At approximately 2 o'clock in the morning I woke up to the sounds of our neighbors going at it.  Yes, it's true we were already in bed long asleep at 2 o'clock in the morning on a Saturday night in Austin.  We're living the dream - in our own way.   I giggled a little bit when I realized what was going down next door at 2 o'clock in the morning, and I couldn't go back to sleep until the screams and moans ended.

I also had flash backs to my senior year in undergrad when I lived with Missy off Far West in Austin.  We had a large (affordable) two bedroom apartment...with thin walls.  We had noisy neighbors that sent screams and moans our way at all hours of the day.  Eventually, the sound was so frequent that I didn't notice it..they were just part of the apartment.  It was always funny when friends would come over and they'd ask: what's that?

Me: That's the sound of Martha (Fauker) snoring?

Guest: Not that.  Do you hear that?

Me: (listening) Oh, that's the sound of the neighbors having sex.  Don't worry, they are noisy but they don't last long.

Then we'd giggle.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

Dooley and Bill

Via my Instagram

Dooley Weds

My four legged daughter's namesake, Sarah Dooley, married her love this weekend in Austin, Texas at the Umlauf Sculpture Gardens.  It was a joyous evening with their friends and family.  I was excited to see Dooley and old friends who were invited guests, but the bonus of the evening was spending time talking to Dooley's mother and her two sisters.  They are a family full of exceptional individuals.

My big achievement of the evening was only eating four slices of pound cake, when I was surrounded by 8 pound cakes.  Long time readers of this blog know there's nothing more delicious than a well baked pound cake.   My late grandmother baked me a sour cream pound cake every year for my birthday, and when cancer prevented her from the joys of her kitchen my mother took over the tradition.

If heaven exist, then it will look something like the glass cake room at the Umlauf Sculture Gardens last night where 8 perfectly baked pound cakes were served in honor of Dooley's wedding  - various members of Dooley's family baked the pound cakes.  It was a brilliant and delicious idea.  I enjoyed a significant slice of each of the following: Whipped Cream Pound Cake, Butter Pecan Pound Cake, Orange Pound Cake, and Cream Cheese Pound Cake with cream and fresh strawberries.

It was one sweet evening.

Best wishes to Dooley and Bill!

Thursday, September 10, 2015

Where have all the doctors gone?

Question: Where have all the cowboys doctors gone?  I feel very lucky that to date my health hasn't required me to have a primary care physician.  I could manage any flu or light illness by consulting my father in law who's a surgeon, dropping into a minute clinic, or stealing medicine when visiting friends.  Why would they leave Z Paks in their medicine cabinets if they didn't want you to have them?

That was the old me.  The new me, who is entering fatherhood, is more responsible.   I found a physician group I liked in Dallas - they are gay friendly.  I have great insurance.  I have a great job.  I submitted an online application, and received a call back informing me the doctors weren't accepting new patients.  They are overbooked because they inherited a patient pool from a retiring primary care physician.  I was information that I could see the PA, to get established in the practice.

This reminded me of one time in 2003 when I was trying to get into the Las Vegas Ghost Bar.

I signed up to see the PA.  I got a physical.  (I hadn't coughed since my high school physical...ah, the awkward moments are so entertaining.)

Do we need more primary care physicians in Dallas? Or, like at the Ghost Bar in 2003, should I have slipped the bouncer one hundred bucks to allow me in?

Monday, September 7, 2015

Matt Damon

Via my Instagram


"No one's being jailed for practicing her religion.  Someone's being jailed for using the government to force others to practice her religion."

- (the brilliant) Rachel Held Evans

The Kim Davis saga continues as she spends her fourth day in jail.   The United States of America is not a Theocracy.  Kim Davis' interpretation of the Bible is not the law of the land.  These concepts are not difficult.

Wednesday, September 2, 2015

Iris Scott

I'm always on the hunt for artist that makes me feel something with their art.  Recently I discovered the work of Iris Scott.  Her finger painting technique produces stunning works of art, which succeed in making me feel something: intrigued, captivated, happy.

Sleeping Dog

Via my Instagram

Monday, August 31, 2015

Welcome to the Family

Who said it best once we announced the arrival of Matt Damon?  Our friend Sherry on Facebook: "You're having twins in a few months.  Why not get a puppy too??"

We had an adventurous weekend.  On Friday we flew out to Washing D.C. where we (romantically) walked over 4 miles around the national mall and surrounding monuments followed by a lovely dinner.  On Saturday we drove approximately an hour outside of town to go pick up our son, Matt Damon.  He's the sweetest little boy.  We kept him awake until we boarded the plane.  He slept most of the flight, but unfortunately he had terrible gas.  He was tooting the entire flight.  Luckily there's plentiful air movement on flights therefore nothing lingered long.

However, when we arrived home (approximately one hour after we landed in Dallas) Damon created an enormous pile in our backyard.  I was shocked at the amount that he created.  If he had performed that act in flight it would have taken down the entire plane.  I feel very lucky our flight was on time and on schedule!

Damon is such a floppy, big eared little boy.

My first bulldog, Martha Fauker, was fully grown around 5 years old when she arrived in our family.  After Martha's passing, a 5 month old Sarah Dooley arrived in our family.  As such, this is the first time I've had a 10 week old puppy.  He's all puppy.

Trigger, who's the sweetest dog within his routine, doesn't like him at all.  However, Trigger didn't like Dooley for the first six months - Trigger's scared, which is why he growls at Damon.  We have to keep them separated unless they are strictly supervised.

Dooley only likes Damon when she's fully rested.  If she's tired, which is often now that Damon has to get up every three hours to pee at night, she doesn't enjoy his puppy-ness.  Why can't we all be happy like a puppy?

Damon is adding lots of joy to our household.  I'm certain Trigger (in six months) and Dooley (in less than six months) will be happy at the new addition to our family.  I really am getting up every three hours to take Damon out (he uses the restroom every time) at night.  Trigger stays in his bed.  Dooley suffers from FOMO (fear of missing out) and so such accompanies us to the backyard.

My goal is to get Damon trained up before the next wave of additions, the twins, arrive in March/April.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

Double Occupancy

We've confirmed our surrogate, Morgan, is carrying our twins in her divine belly.  Once we learned the news it was a joyous moment in the sonogram/ultrasound room at Dr. Kaufmann's offices on Friday afternoon.  We were all cheering.  My mother was crying with happiness, and my father was asking if he was the only person that didn't know what he was looking at on the screen?  I hope my sons get my father's sense of timing with humor.

It was actually exactly how Adam (my friend and father of twins) explained it to me; Adam informed me the discovery of twins in a womb happens immediately.  He remembers being surprised at how fast it all happened.  For us, as soon as Dr. Kaufmann began the procedure I saw a flash of two dark spots on the screen and I heard a gasp from Morgan.  She gasped because she saw twins! While Morgan has had three pregnancies previously, she has never carried twins.

My brother gave us twin figurines.  My husband's mother gave us twin stuffed animals. Morgan gave us twin blankets.  Friday night I couldn't sleep because I started to think of the implications of twins.  Two of everything for the rest of our life?!  Two babies in diapers. Two teenagers. Two undergraduate degrees.  Two graduate degrees.  I guess I won't retire?  Of course we'll also get twice the love...retirement is overrated, I'm certain.

Twin Photo

Via my Instagram

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Forty Sixty Dinner Party

This month my parents will have been married for forty years and my mother will have been alive for sixty years.  To celebrate this milestone (achievement) my parents engaged a private chef to cook for us all on Saturday evening at our house.

It was a night of tiny crab cakes, pulled pork on bite sized cheddar biscuits, green salad, scallops, fillets, and a dessert trio.  It was an elegant, interesting evening.

My parents and our nieces spent the weekend with us while my brother, uncle, and grandfather crashed for one night.  It was lovely to have a house full of some of the crazy people I love.

It's a nice reminder that what matters most in life are the relationships you have with the people you love.  Nothing else really matters.

Dinner Party

Via my Instagram

Monday, August 17, 2015

Six Weeks Two Days

Today we're at six weeks and two days.  Morgan, our gestational surrogate, is reporting that she's "sea sick" most of the day, tired in the afternoons, and craving steaks and pickles.  I am sorry Morgan is feeling nauseated, since I don't want her to experience discomfort; however, the changes in her body are keeping the pregnancy real.  As in, this is really happening!  It's reassuring to hear stories of her pregnancy woes, since it means our boy(s) are growing.

On Friday, the day before seven weeks, we will have our first sonogram to determine if one or both of the embryos are growing inside her sacred womb.  I'm both excited and nervous.

I'm nervous enough that I have to ask myself: Is it possible that something physically changing in me too?  Ever since our doctor transferred two embryos into Morgan I've become hyperaware of stories of miscarriages, stillbirths, and wombs going empty.   I've become my late grandmother Peaches: worry, worry, worry!  On Saturday night I kept having a dream that our doctor couldn't find anything in Morgan's womb.  It was a ridiculous dream.

I was speaking to my father this weekend about my newly discovered craziness.

Me: I'm sure I'll stop worrying once we hit 20 weeks, right?  No wait...I'm sure I'll stop worrying once they arrive, right?

My father:  No, you'll worry about them the rest of your life.

Me: That's what everyone keeps telling me!

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

I want to know... it wrong on Wednesday nights when I'm at home alone (my husband travels for business) or when I'm at a hotel alone (sometimes I travel for business) I like to watch QVC's In the Kitchen with David?  I work.  David keeps me company.

Ashley Longshore

I'm pretty sure we all need an Ashley Longshore on our walls.  Unfortunately art requires cash, and I am also pretty sure I will never have cash again after making these baby(ies).  These future child(ren) will expect to be fed, clothed, and educated.  My husband's mother recently informed my husband that, ahem, children are expensive raise, and then she asked if we were still saving money!  (Love it!)

During the teenage years when our kids act out, I'm going to yell things like: "I could have purchased an Ashley Longshore!"


"Judge Orlando Garcia gave Texas an Aug. 24 deadline to recognize same-sex marriages on death and birth certificates."

Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Baby Love

After confirmation of our pregnancy Cousin Sarah and her family sent us our first baby gift.  Hooray for milestones! In the card Cousin Sarah proclaimed she loves us both to pieces and she can't wait to love and adore our precious children.  What a lovely thought!  It's going to be fun to raise our children within our circle of family and friends.  Hopefully, Cousin Sarah's crew can help make our children more worldly since Cousin Sarah's crew split their time between Texas and Eastern Europe.

Another token of wisdom Cousin Sarah, mother of three, said to us: relax while you can!  Now that type of advice concerns me a little bit, because I'm starting to see a trend.  This is the most common type of advice parents give us once they learn we're expecting.  For example, our friend Adam, father of two, said we should enjoy sleeping for the next 8 months.  My husband's sister, mother of two, told us to enjoy our freedom while it last.

Apparently kids wreck your relaxing, sleeping, and freeing (?) schedule!  

I'm assured the journey of fatherhood and the havoc to my schedule is worthwhile by my BFF Del, father of two,  because he told us there is a type of love that only parents can experience/understand.   He said childless individuals will never understand the powerful type of love mothers and fathers have for their children.  He is joyful that my husband and I will understand that type of love in 2016!

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Fatima Ronquillo New Show

For those of you with disposable income,  one of the my favorite artists (she's a living master) Fatima Ronquillo recently posted her newest masterpieces from her current solo show at the Meyers East Gallery in Santa Fe, New Mexico.

I love these paintings!