Wednesday, October 31, 2012

I voted.

Hooray for early voting.  I voted.  President Obama fully supports gay Americans, which means I fully support him.  (Republicans, see how that works?)

Tuesday, October 30, 2012


I am weak.  I am human.  I am powerless to resist a furniture floor sample sale. I disappointed my husband this weekend when I brought home Crate&Barrel's design challenge winning Julie Misfsud chair.  It was 65% off of the retail price, which feels like a tremendous deal considering the amount of style this comfortable little chair brings to our bedroom.

At 65% off I think I saved my husband money.  He doesn't agree with my arithmetic.  He never has.  He says when I spend money I'm not saving money.  Let's agree to disagree, okay?

I think I'm a little disappointed in myself at my weakness.  Just a little.  It was an impulse buy, and floor samples cannot be returned.  When my husband is away on the weekends getting his MBA I get lonely/restless and so I go shopping.  It kills time.  It makes me smile.

As my punishment my husband says I'm going to have to fly coach to Israel.  Yes, my husband might have to travel to Israel, and I'm not letting him go without me.

Monday, October 29, 2012


Many months ago I told my boss that I'd work harder if he'd pay me in Williams-Sonoma gift cards.  We had a laugh.   This weekend a courier dropped off a care package from my boss which included a fat Williams-Sonoma gift card and a note from my firms' leadership thanking me for my hard work and positive contributions.

It felt amazing to be recognized and appreciated by my leadership team; I was a bit taken back by how amazing it made me feel...An unexpected gift at an unexpected time (as my father always said) makes the most positive impact.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

SER Steak + Spirits

If God exists, then clearly she wants us to spend more time with our family.  My husband unexpectedly caught an earlier flight from Philidelphia (he's always motivated to see me sooner!) and he was rewarded for his efforts because he ended up on the same flight as our cousin Sarah that lives in Georgia (the country, not the state).  She was flying from D.C. to Dallas, and Aunt Charlotte was picking her up from the airport.   They were headed to dinner at SER Steak + Spirits.  I picked up my husband, and we crashed their dinner plans.

It was a beautiful night of great conversation and much laughter.  The night turned into an early birthday celebration for our aunt.  We lost Sarah's attention for a long moment because SER gives you an iPad where they have the wine menu listed; she was buried in the iPad, and we all began to wonder if she was actually playing a game?  Sarah made up for her lost time, because my husband and my aunt loved her selection.

Cheers to my aunt, my cousin, my husband and surprise dinners with the ones you love!

Friday, October 26, 2012

Cuddle Bug

When we're watching TV Dooley likes to sleep between our legs.  It's very sweet.  She's happy if she's with us.  I get it- I'm happy when I'm with my husband!

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Come and Get It

When I called my husband to dinner and he saw the large quantities of curry pasta chicken salad and my Aunt Jan's broccoli crunch salad he shook his head at me.  I was cooking dinner for two people, and I made five pounds of the curry chicken and three pounds of broccoli crunch.   I can't help it.

I worked in catering while I was in college, and therefore it's easier for me to cook in large quantities.  My husband likes to joke that my college job is costing us a fortune in grocery bills.  I would rather not cook, than to cook a small amount of food for two people.

Maybe we'll adopt five sons that can take down my cooking in one meal?  That'd be nice.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Justification for a Higher Education

My mother was my 7th grade reading teacher, my 8th grade English teacher, and my 12th grade AP Government and Economics teacher.  She spent a lot of time creating a classroom that promoted learning, and the posters that hung on her walls even promoted thought.  I still recall this exact "Justification for Higher Education" poster hanging on her wall.  Clearly it's trying to motivate car-crazy teenagers to study harder.

Last night when I saw our garage with TWO Infinitis parked inside I thought of that poster that hung on my mother's classroom wall.  It made me smile with pride.

First Brand New Car - Rejoice!

I cannot believe I have a brand spanking new 2013 Infiniti JX35 parked in my garage.  This is my first brand new car!  It had 15 miles on it when we drove it home from the dealership.  I really don't want to drive it.  I want to look at it.  Sit in it.  Smell it.  Kiss it - wait, what?  I'm so excited about my new car!

Of course I've already branded my new car with a chrome Longhorn.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012


Calling herself a "Republican at heart," the 30-year-old Texas native told the Daily Star: “I’ve been reading online about the debates and I’m probably going to vote for Obama again...I can’t support Romney’s policies as I have a lot of gay friends and I don’t think it’s fair they can’t get married."

But it isn't just lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) issues that are prompting Clarkson to switch party lines: “I’m not a hardcore feminist but we can’t be going back to the ’50s."

She then noted, "Obama is a great guy. I’ve met him and I’m a fan of Michelle, too."

Thank you for supporting the homos Kelly Clarkson! We adore you.

Mitt Is AntiGay? Then I'm AntiMitt!

As long at the Republican party is anti-gay it is impossible for me to vote for a Republican. I saw this on Towleroad over the weekend: "Governor Romney supports a federal marriage amendment to the Constitution that defines marriage as an institution between a man and a woman."

Republicans are (allegedly) the party of small government - except when it comes to social issues.  It's very confusing to me.  They promote a "winner take all" society where risk takers are rewarded financially, but they want the government to protect marriage from the gays?  Ridiculous.  How again does my marriage affect yours?  Why can't I have the freedom to marry the person I love?

Monday, October 22, 2012

Dog Pile Longhorns

My current client operates deep in the heart of the Oklahoma oil fields, and Sooners really enjoy harassing Longhorns.  Last week my desk was covered in anti-Longhorn stuff.   (See the photo above for one example.)  This week I cleaned it all up.  I can handle a joke, and I do enjoy some punchiness in the office.  However, what surprises me most is that non-OU fans were happy to dog pile on the Longhorns...after OU beat Texas.   I would never dog pile on OU if they were beaten by another Texas team.  It's so weird to me.

Do you think Oklahoma is jealous of Texas?  It sure seems that way to me.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Birthday Girl

We celebrated the birth of my husband's mother last Thursday.  I am forever appreciative to my husband's makers.  We were actually both out of town on Thursday, but my husband took Sprinkles and gifts to his mother earlier in the week.  Of course, Dooley adores her Yaya too, and she wanted to give the birthday girl sweet birthday kisses.

Happy Birthday indeed! Thanks a billion Birthday Girl for making and rearing my husband!  Love you!

The Collective Gay Gasp!

Did you hear the collective gasp coming from all the gays in Dallas last night?  Madonna canceled her Saturday night Dallas show due to laryngitis and mandatory vocal rest, but her Sunday night Dallas show is still on!  This would have been a cool show to see,  and maybe she'll come out with an HBO special at the end of the tour?

Thursday, October 18, 2012

The Gay Bomb

I take really good care of my things.  I've taken really good care of my Toyota 4Runner, but 8+ years and 150,000 miles later, I'm ready for something new.  Anyone want to buy a much loved 4Runner?

When I'm shopping and someone is earning a commission, then I like to drop the "gay bomb" unexpectedly in a conversation to test their reaction.  If they have a bad reaction, then I'm not buying from them.   For example, the Audi salesman Bruce was talking up the Q5 and I said I'll have to see what my husband thinks. Bruce didn't flinch, and he asked my husband's name.   Unfortunately, the Q5 is too small for my needs.  I wished Bruce well and moved one.  The Infinti salesman Russell saw my wedding ring and asked about my wife- I said I had a husband not a wife!  Russell didn't flinch either, and he said something about my husband later in the conversation.  However, when I mentioned my husband to the Honda salesman Ross he didn't acknowledge the statement.  Later I brought up my husband again, and again Honda Ross ignored it.  Clearly, Ross didn't know how to handle the situation, and he's been selling Honda's since 2008!

What's interesting is that time and time again people at higher end retail are more skilled at handling gay clients.  They don't flinch.  One of the reasons I don't want to buy another Toyota is because I never felt comfortable around Toyota dealerships and their service departments.   In fact, I don't want to buy a GM, Ford, Dodge, or Jeep product either, because I've never felt comfortable in those environments.  I don't know why?

The AWD Touring Honda Pilot is $10K cheaper than the AWD Infinti JX, but it looks like I'll feel more comfortable in Infiniti dealerships than Honda dealerships when I have the scheduled maintenance.  This is all a part of my decision tree.  Do straight people think like this?

The shopping continues...

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


"When you say, 'I think being gay is a choice', you are calling me a liar.  I am NOT a liar!  I am fed up with your arrogance, ignorance and religious bigotry to justify your own homophobia.  What you are doing is holding on to a book that promotes slavery, the stoning of rebellious children and forced marriage between a rapist and his victim.  Your Bible got that wrong too!"

- Del Shores (writer, director, storyteller, standup comedian)

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Everyone's Welcome

This magazine advertisement made me smile on the inside and out.  It's making it clear that in Las Vegas, everyone's welcome even straight people!  Take note that the big Adventures in Babysitting boat of car is surrounded by a Porsche and convertible.  The idea that straight people have no style makes me giggle, even if it's unfair or untrue or both.

I want the "everyone's welcome" to be the motto in more places.  Maybe at the marriage alter?

Monday, October 15, 2012


"I just now watched that video of Sally Field. That was great - both she and her son. Very impressive. Thanks for sending it. I so love my son and brother who nature made different than my other son and my sister..... And "so the fuck what!". .... Big Smile"

-My mom in a family email

Sunday, October 14, 2012

State Fair Fun

The State Fair of Texas is in our backyard, and while my husband was away getting his MBA my parents and I went to the State Fair of Texas.  It was a quick trip.  We looked at the new cars, ate corny dogs, and walked through the petting zoo.

Afterwards we went and test drove some cars and then went to Nordstrom.  And my husband will be pleased to note that I didn't spend any of my money...thanks mom and dad!

Friday, October 12, 2012


We've spent over $3,000 on repairs and maintenance this year on my 2004 Toyota 4Runner with 150,000+ miles on it.  My goal was to drive my 4Runner until 200,000 miles, but for some reason I'm having issues with my 4Runner.  My friend Melissa has a 4Runner with over 225,000 miles and she claims she's not had any issues with it.  (*insert me rolling my eyes at Melissa*)

I think it's time for me to consider getting a new car.  Sigh.  Maybe another 4Runner?  I love cars, but I don't love spending money on cars!

My Drawers

Our friend Carolina has been the (cleaning) lady of our house for many years.  She takes complete ownership of our house and it's cleanliness. It always makes me laugh when I discover that she's tidied up our underwear drawer.  The first time she straightened up my underwear drawer I was embarrassed, but now I find it funny.  Carolina also cleans out the fridge, rearranges our closets, and our house is like her house!  In general Carolina rocks it.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Heteros With No Babies

My friend from college, Nikki, has been married to Robert at least as long as I've been married to my husband.  Maybe longer?  Nikki and Robert don't have kids.  This weekend we were at a party and Nikki asked me if I secretly despise people who could have babies but don't?  It was an interesting question to discuss over cocktails.  Yes, Nikki and her husband could make a baby for free, and as long as they have medical insurance there is very little cost associated with bringing a baby into their family.  Yes, my husband and I will spend a lot of money to adopt an infant or lots more money to use surrogacy to create an infant.  But, no, I'm not annoyed with heteros that don't make babies.

I'm happy for any couple that lives with intention.  If you want kids, then make it happen.  If you don't want kids, then don't make it happen.  

I get tired of strangers blanketing their beliefs over my life ("marriage is defined as one man and one woman") therefore I don't project my beliefs onto other situations.  I never thought about how I felt about heteros that don't make babies until Nikki asked, which is why it was an interesting question.

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Traveling Pound Cake

The sensational woman we named our daughter in honor of, Sarah Dooley, spent a few hours at our house on Sunday night and she brought four delicious pieces of her home made pound cake from Houston, Texas.  I didn't share a single piece with my husband, is that wrong?  I packed up those precious pieces and put them in my suitcase.  Yes, I travel with homemade pound cake.  And I won't share that deliciousness with my client either.

Monday, October 8, 2012


I'm really enjoying P!nk's newest album: The Truth About Love.  I think we own all 6 of her albums, and over time she's turned into one of my favorites.  I like her point of view, which always comes with an edge. You have to (HAVE TO) check out "Beam Me Up."  When I heard the song I thought about my grandmother, very soon it will be one year since she died, and I also thought about how terrible it would be if I out lived my husband. That would suck.  That would really suck.  I don't even want to think about how much that would suck to live in a world without my husband.

Sunday, October 7, 2012

Austin Weekend

My husband and I spent the weekend in Austin, Texas.  Our careers and my husband's MBA are cutting into our time together.  It was fun to spend a weekend together.  I used to call Austin, Texas the city of my heart, but now any city I'm in with my husband is my favorite city.

Friday night we hung out with Scott and Amanda at a fair trade art show and then we went to dinner at Ruth's Chris.  Saturday we went to an alumni BBQ and then the UT football game.  Sunday on our way back to Dallas we stopped to have lunch with my husband's parents.  Sunday night, in Dallas, we had dinner with Dooley and Nini.  My husband did a lot of homework throughout the weekend.

Thursday, October 4, 2012


"Christian leaders, stand on our soil and claim: "gay marriage" has never occurred here.  Over 130 tribes in every region of North America performed millions of same-sex marriages for hundreds of years.  Their statements are both hateful and ignorant.  Your "homosexuals," was our "Two Spirits" people...and we considered them sacred."

Wednesday, October 3, 2012


Wealth is relative.  Based on our household income, technically, most Americans would put my husband and me in the wealthy bucket.  However, most of our running buddies seem to have bigger houses and nicer cars than we do.  To me, a person is wealthy if they own their dream house, can pay cash for their dream car, and have enough money in the bank to retire.  We're not wealthy, yet.

Again, wealth is relative.  I was reviewing payroll for one of my clients, and I noticed that one of their accounting clerks (who's excellent at her job) makes $15 and hour plus benefits.  Her net weekly paycheck was less than $500.  It really made me stop and reflect.

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Nordstrom Beauty

My mother mailed me this photo, which was in the Nordstrom catalog. I wonder if this Frenchie is related to our daughter Sarah Dooley?  This pup is almost as cute as Dooley.

Monday, October 1, 2012

The New Normal is My Normal (almost)

Are you watching NBC's newest comedy The New Normal?  It technically is classified as a comedy, but it has some real moments that sting.  It hurts when they get gay bashed - especially if you're two gay guys like us.  I can really relate to this thirty-something gay couple who aren't exactly young and aren't exactly old, and they are wanting to have a family.

However, the situation seems a bit mythical to me because they have a millionaire lifestyle.  Their house, their cars, their shopping, are all top notch expensive.  One reason I keep this blog is because I think in popular culture gays are depicted as either 1) rich power couples or 2) party gogo dancing boys.  I'm here to prove that gays are also working middle class men living in a red state, which might be more normal but less entertaining than The New Normal.