Weekend Fun

My husband is out of town at a business conference, and so my parents loaded up the dogs and came to Dallas for the weekend.  We went to great restaurants, we went to the movies, we went on walks, we just hung out.  It was a nice way to spend the weekend.  I get sad when I'm apart from my husband on the weekends; I was happy to have my parents here to keep my spirits up.

I took this photo on our walk- the tulips are blooming in Dallas.

The King's Speech

I, for the first time, saw The King's Speech last night with my parents; it was their second time to watch the film. Now I know why they were willing to watch it again- it's such an inspiring story. 

This film supports the "everyone's pain is the same" theory on life.  You can be a gay man living your life in this century or a king to one quarter of the world's population living last century and you still have your own life's struggles to overcome.  I think the key to life is thriving through the ups and downs.  We all have ups and downs- even kings.

Completely Inappropriate

At work I often feel like a lone ranger.  I work at a conservative firm, and I'm the only gay employee.  I'm also the only gay person many of my colleagues have ever known. I've blogged before about how sometimes I get tired of being the first gay person in a situation, but if I want my future children to live in a more perfect world, then I need to blaze the trail in my own way.  Before I was hired my colleagues only knew of gay people from friends of friends, popular culture, movies, etc.  Now they know me.  They know my husband.  And I feel completely accepted at work.

However, sometimes I have bad days at the office.  This week a director, who is recently divorced called me into his office.  I first need to explain that technically as a "director" this guy out-ranks me, but he is not in my chain of command since I report to the CFO.  I think he thinks of me more as a peer- even though I don't have the fancy title or big director pay check!  So this director called me into his office.  He began the conversation with the following statement: "I know this is completely inappropriate for work, but..."  (Note to the world: if you have to begin a question with the statement: "I know this is completely inappropriate for work, but..."  then you shouldn't ask the question while at work!) 

You might not want to continue to read this post.  (Especially if you're my mother or my husband's mother.)

"I know this is completely inappropriate for work, but...in this office you're the best person to ask..." 

This director went on to say that he was dating a girl that was open to having anal intercourse, but he had tried it once and it didn't work for them.  He wanted to know if I had any tips on how to successfully have anal intercourse?  I laughed at the question.  I was shocked.  Surprised.  Nervous.  I was at work.  I was in this guy's office during regular business hours, and he was asking me about anal intercourse!?

The situation was completely inappropriate, and it really bothered me.

I think I'm ready to start looking for a new job... 

The Fearlessness of Youth

Here's video of a group of college guys showing their fearlessness! They are lip singing to Katy Perry's Teenage Dream.  This video makes me smile because the guys are just having fun.  It is one of the reasons college is such a powerful time- you have the freedom to have as much fun as you want!  Bravo guys!

Trigger

My husband took this photo of our son, Trigger, yesterday after they walked to the lake.  They got caught in the rain storm that blew through town, and my husband said Trigger pulled him back to the house as soon as it started raining.  I was so impressed that Trigger knew the most direct way back to our house.  My son is genius.

Physics

Earlier this week while I was killing some of my brain cells by watching MTV's Jersey Shore my husband was helping our friend's 16-year-old high school junior study for her physics exam.  My husband is a genius. The white erase board was heavily utilized during the review session, and I could tell lots of learning was going on at our kitchen table.

I Need Sleep

I am worried.  I am really worried; if an 8-month-old puppy is disrupting my life, then what will a new-born baby do to it?  My husband is out of town on a business trip this week.  I'm living the life of a single dad, since I have to take care of the two dogs.  Each night this week Dooley has woken up around 2:00 AM and again around 4:00 AM and then right before my alarm usually goes off at 5:50 AM.  I am so tired at work.  When I get home from work the dogs are so rambunctious that I have to spend hours entertaining them before I can go to bed.  I'm living life without my deep sleep cycle!  How does my brother and his wife do this with their two children?  It's not easy. 

Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work

First, get rid of your current opinion of Joan Rivers (I used to think of her as the original red carpet diva with too much plastic surgery), and then watch her documentary Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work.  It was fascinating.  You especially must watch this film if you're crazy enough to desire a career in the entertainment industry.  This film follows Joan around for one year, and the insecurities, rejections, successes, and jokes make this film worth your time.  It's unbelievable that a 75-year-old millionaire would be so hungry to work any gig- she never turns down work.  When I see a film like this I wonder why anyone would ever want a career in show business. 

QOTD

From Brandon Stanton: "I love the gays. Always have. I respect the hell out of them. Because at some point in his or her life, every gay person has to look society straight in the eye and say: “I’m gay, and I really don’t give a fuck what you think.” And that isn’t an easy thing to do. If everyone had that kind of courage, there’d be a lot less frowning faces on the subway. There’d probably be more people dancing on floats, half-naked, covered in metallic body paint, and waving peacock feathers in the air. Because you can’t really be free until you don’t give a fuck. And not giving a fuck is just about the hardest thing there is to do. And every gay person has to do it. And I respect the hell out of that. Always have."

Be Careful

From USA Today: "Conservative Christian leaders ought to be very careful about their rhetoric going forward — careful not to continue giving the impression that being Christian is in large measure about opposing gay rights, and careful not to let the public expression of their faith become primarily associated with something that looks, sounds and feels like hate to growing segments of the population."

I agree.

Tom Krattenmaker wrote an interesting article in USA Today called "On gay rights, keep fighting or adapt?"  I've always been confused by the fact that Conservative Christians have been totally and completely anti-gay.  WWJD?  Throughout history the Bible has been used (among other things) to justify slavery and suppress women's rights, and in our time it is used to discriminate against gays. Again, WWJD?

Hooray for Hawaii

From NPR: "The Hawaii Legislature approved a bill on Wednesday allowing civil unions for same-sex couples, sending the measure to the state's Democratic governor, who has said he will sign it into law."

In 2009 we vacationed in Hawaii, and I've wanted to return ever since we left.  It's a wonderful spot on earth.  Now I want to go back even more; thank you Hawaii for believing in equal rights!

Open Drawers

My husband has the ability to close a drawer in our chest of drawers when he gets out a pair of socks or his underwear or his undershirt, but he does not. He leaves them wide open. This used to annoy me. "Close the drawers!" I'd holler at him as I slid it back into place.

Similarly, I have the ability to secure the lid to anything with a childproofed lid- pill bottles, Listerine, etc., but I do not. I just set the lid on top of the bottle, because it makes it easier to open the next time. I think this annoys my husband; especially since sometimes he picks up items by their lids and he always assumes they are secured even when they are not. More than once ibuprofen pills have been scattered across our bathroom floor and I hear the many tiny tapping sounds of pills hitting the floor followed by my husband shouting: "HONEY!"

It used to annoy me, but now I think it's charming that my husband is incapable of sliding a drawer back into place; when he is away on business I miss walking into the bedroom and seeing open drawers. I like to think if I was away on business my husband would miss the excitement I add by leaving our lids ajar.

Normal

My husband's father told us yesterday that he needs more grandchildren, and we needed to do our part to make that happen. His comment made me feel-- so normal!

Money Grab

I love my dogs. You know this. I do not love visiting the veterinarian's office. When we visit the vet I always feel like it's a money grab. Take note because we are living in the heyday for vets. We paid over $500 to get Dooley spayed last week. I called my brother and told him about how much we just spent getting Dooley fixed, and he told me when he took his two dogs to get spayed six years ago he spent $1,200.

If you're a young person and thinking about going to medical school- DON'T. You can't make the big bucks being a doctor- that's a thing of the past. If you're a young person and interested in medicine, then you need to go to veterinarian school and become a vet! Open a practice close to a us and you will become a millionaire!

Steak Dinner

Nothing says love like a good piece of meat. (That's what she said.) Since my husband is a road warrior he'll be leaving on a jet plane tomorrow morning, Valentine's Day, and he won't return until the end of the week. We normally ignore Valentine's Day, but we were inspired by my husband's parents and decided Valentine's day is a good excuse to have a steak dinner. Tonight we had grilled steaks, stuffed jalapenos, baked potatoes, and a green salad. It was quite the delicious dinner!

Yaya is a yogie

My husband's mother, who's a beautiful little lady, went to yoga with us today. She lasted the whole 90-minutes and she did really well considering it was her first Bikram yoga class. The most difficult part of your first Bikram class is getting acclimated to the hot room. Way to go Lou Who!

I don't really enjoy doing yoga as much as I enjoy the way it makes me feel afterwards. It's an intense 90 minutes that makes me feel amazing. I hope my husband's mother felt amazing the rest of the day.

Scar Belly

This is a picture of Dooley's shaved belly with her scar from getting spayed. I picked her up on Friday and she was groggy and disoriented for the rest of the night. However, when she woke up Saturday morning her pistol personality returned. Now we have to work to keep her from being too rambunctious. The vet told us to keep her throttled back until her sutures are removed in two weeks.

Hooray for Progress!

We received an email from a family member, which proves that we're making progress in our society. We had a wedding in May of 2006, and this family member choose not to attend the event. I felt like this situation is important to share with the readers of this blog; therefor, here is a paragraph from the email we received (I edited it to remove our names):

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"I feel like I owe you two an apology…much overdue, to say the least. I wasn’t at your commitment ceremony years ago when I could have been. I was so immersed in the church I belonged to and the ministry I helped lead, that I let some of the very judgmental ideals of the church decide how I felt about your relationship. It was wrong. I don’t know if this is surprising to you, or if perhaps you’ve known this all along, but I feel like I owe you this apology even years later. I have no hang-ups about this anymore; in fact, I admire your relationship just as I do my other awesome cousins’. My opinion, obviously, doesn’t matter one bit, but it saddens me when I think about how I acted/believed in the past…and the opportunities I may have missed to better know you two. I just want you to know how much I enjoy what limited time we have during the holidays, and that I wish we could spend more time together! You’re both amazing men whom I’m blessed to call family."

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Hooray for progress! Life goes on...

The Fix

Our baby girl has an appointment to get fixed tomorrow, and I'm starting to get a little jittery about the procedure, but we're contractually obligated to get her fixed since we purchased her as a companion dog. Animals get spayed all the time, and the vet we're taking her to owns English bulldogs and he understands the special anesthetic protocol required for Brachycphalic dogs. Logically I know she'll be fine, but emotionally I'm worried about my baby girl.

I can't relax about it.

If I feel this way about my four-legged baby girl, then I'm pretty sure I'm going to be a domineering beast with our future two-legged baby girl/boy. Yikes!

Dooley, you got some 'splainin' to do.

While we were at yoga Dooley was gnawing on the door trim in the guest bathroom. I guess I need to provide her with more bones to chew...

Stuff

When we paid the credit card bill that included our January ski trip I realized that if we hadn't gone snow skiing I could have purchased the candle holder from Anthropologie and the chair from Restoration Hardware that I adore and we would have more money in the bank today. I told my husband this. He rolled his eyes. He looked at me and said; "That's all you need honey- more stuff."

A few hours later he asked if when I die will all my stuff come to the funeral?

I really do think being married to my husband has made me a better version of myself. He embraces me-in all my gloriousness- which helps wear down my edges; I like it when my husband explains how sharing the joy of a snow ski trip (a family tradition) is worth more than stuff.

I want to know...

...is it wrong that I'm hoping the ice and snow the weather people are predicting to fall from the sky tonight is sever enough that I don't have to go into the office tomorrow? Is it greedy to want another snow day? Even Trigger enjoyed the snow day last Friday, see photo above.

Valentine's Day Card

As I was walking away from my desk headed to lunch I mentioned that I needed to run by Target, and my buddy Jordan stopped me and asked me to please pick up a Valentine's Day card for him to give to his wife. He. Was. Serious. He was not joking. HE WAS SERIOUS! He wanted me to pick out a Valentine's Day card that he could give to his wife next week! It put me in a moral dilemma. Jordan is my friend and I wanted to help him out, but I couldn't because I would be devastated if I found out someone else was picking out the romantic cards my husband was giving to me...

Hooray for Glee!

Glee makes me happy. I love watching Glee each week. It's inspiring to see their gay couple as an important storyline...it's the world as it should be.

Never Say Die

My goal is to legally get married to my husband in Texas before we die. Today we're thirty. I was planning on living until we were 100, because we might need that much time before a majority of Texans will have enough wisdom to allow us to marry. I was planning on living until 100, until I read the book review in the Daily Beast for Susan Jacoby's Never Say Die. My takeaway is that most people that live to be old-old (in their 80's-90's) are going to be out of their minds and out of money living in a nursing home...

Come on Texas! You need to give us equal rights before we turn 65, because the risk of Alzheimer’s disease doubles in every five-year period over 65!

Some Like It Cold

Trigger doesn't like to get off the covered patio and into the snow covered yard. Dooley, on the other hand, is very adventurous and she's been running around in the snow hoping her brother (Trigger) will chase her...it's terrific that both our dogs have such distinct personalities.

Warm Food

We ventured out into the whiteness in search of food. Thank goodness for four-wheel drive. We passed a couple of stuck cars; we were passed by a couple of ambulances. We ended up at our favorite neighborhood Indian restaurant, Roti Grill. It was open, but we were the only customers. When we walked in the staff was eating Coal Vines pizza and watching Spanish Soap Operas. They stopped their lunch so they could make us lunch. The tomato soup is amazing- they serve it in a coffee mug. You must try this tomato soup.

After lunch we stopped by Central Market, The K9 Commissary, and our neighbor's house. We're back at home with both people and dog food, and we're ready to wait-out the coldness. I just got the new House Beautiful magazine, which I plan to read, and my husband is working in his office...

Ah, I love snow days.

Home Sweet Home

Snow Day

I hope I never outgrow the joy of having an unexpected "snow day." Last night our part of Dallas was blanketed with soft powdery snow. I think we got around 4 to 5 inches of snow. This week's weather has been crazy. I did not drive into work today. Hooray for a snow day!

My Family is Calling

If you recall from previous post I'm a super commuter. I drive 35 miles each way to work. Tuesday morning after the ice storm hit Dallas/Fort Worth our home phone was ringing. First, My father called. My husband answered. My father told my husband to tell me not to attempt to drive to work today. Next, my brother called. My husband answered. My brother told my husband to tell me not to drive to work today. Finally, my mother called. My husband answered. My mother wanted to make sure my husband had told me not to drive to work today.

My husband sincerely thought it was funny that my family kept calling. However, I think he felt neglected because he asked my mother, while she was still on the line, why no one was calling to make sure he wasn't driving today?! My mother responded that since he works from home she hopes he doesn't step on Dooley while he walks to his office...and then she reminded him to tell me to not drive to work.

Icy Mess

I drove to work today. The roads were an icy mess. I survived. I was prepared to drive on the ice today, because last night on our drive home from yoga I slid out of the parking lot. I put my 4Runner in four-wheel drive and then I drove like normal- I lost control. I was surprised. My husband turned the sliding-out-of-control moment into a coaching opportunity and he explained how I had to drive differently when I'm on ice.

It's good to have coaching moments when your sliding-out-of-control, right?

Qote of the Day

When Secretary of State Hillary Clinton's chief of staff and counselor Cheryl Mills was asked why the battle for LGBT equality stirs her she said the following:

“My life has been created based on the other people who have fought for the privileges that I have—the privileges that I have to be a lawyer, to have gone to the institutions that I’ve gone to, even just to get educated as an African-American,” Mills explains. “So when I look at some of the limitations that others experience, I’m conscious of the fact that other people chose, for me, to put their lives and their privileges on the line, and I have an obligation to step up as well.”

Source.

Thank you Hillary

I just read my subscription copy of the February 2011 edition of The Advocate, and I loved the article written about Hillary Clinton. I encourage you to read it here. She appears to be a very enlighten individuals that cares deeply for all people.

Here are few Hillary Clinton quotes from the article I wanted to share:

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"Just as I was very proud to say the obvious more than 15 years ago in Beijing- that human rights are women's rights, and women's rights are human rights- well, let me say today that human rights are gay rights, and gay rights are human rights, once and for all."

"I just really have a strong negative reaction to prejudice, discrimination, hatred, violence- anything that tries to delegitimize or marginalize any of our fellow human beings. So it fits into my long-term and personally felt commitment to expanding the circle of human rights for everyone."

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Thank You Barbara Bush

From The Daily Beast:

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Bold move, Barbara Bush. The daughter of former President George W. Bush released a YouTube video Monday coming out in support of gay marriage. Her statement is a complete departure from her father, who, as president, pushed for a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage. Bush, 29, declares in the video, “I am Barbara Bush and I am a New Yorker for marriage equality.” She joins other children of conservative politicians, such as Meghan McCain and Liz Cheney, an out lesbian, who broke with their fathers to support gay marriage. As for Bush, a Manhattan resident, a friend said she has many openly gay friends and was “loved by the gay community at Yale.”

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Thank you Barbara! I love the wisdom of youth! It appears that gay marriage is a generational issue; the older you are the less likely you are to support gay marriage. The good news is that we're 30-years-old and if we live long enough, then my husband and I will be allowed to get married in Texas...I hope.