Sunday, November 4, 2012

Open Letter

Dear Sergeant Dunn (Badge # 185) Of The Southlake Texas Police,

  1. You suck.
  2. I would hardly call 45 MPH speeding.  I'm pretty sure I can snow ski faster than that, and I'm certain wildebeests can run faster than 45 MPH.  Why don't you go to the plains of Africa and hand out citations to the "speeding" wildebeests?
  3. YOU suck.
  4. You also suspiciously asked if my address was correct on my drivers licenses BEFORE you started writing my citation- is this how you treat all guests to your town?  Suburbia is so annoying.  What happened to: "Hey visitor, did you know we've created a 30 MPH speed trap on Carroll Boulevard even though every other street in this area is 45 MPH?  Please slow down, and have a nice day"?  Where's the friendly reminder Sergeant Dunn?!? You KNOW I don't live in your town!
  5. You SUCK.
  6. Why were you surprised when I didn't give you my phone number? You were writing me a ticket!  I don't want my phone number in your suburbia database.  What idiot gives a police officer their phone number while he's writing them a ticket? Next time, don't write me a ticket, and I might give you my phone number.  Might.  Finally, "To protect and serve" is not your police motto; the Southlake police motto is "to give our out of town guests $175 tickets for not driving 30 MPH in our our speed traps so we can pay for our fancy Tahoe police car."
  7. YOU SUCK!  


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