Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tiger is human too?!

The Tiger Woods voicemail his (home-wrecking) lady friend gave to the press has really got me in a tizzy today. I am sad. I am disappointed because it looks like Tiger cheated on his wife just like all the other stereotypical superstar athletes. Did you hear the voicemail? He's so guilty. Although I cannot relate to being a billionaire international athlete, which appears to include an endless amount of beautiful people trying to get into your pants at all times, I know enough to realize Tiger had four options; three of which no one gets hurt.
  1. Never marry. Stay single and enjoy all the flings you desire.
  2. Marry a woman who is fine with an "open" marriage. Almost like a plural marriage that the Mormons promote, but you have one wife and then girlfriends on the side. No secrets.
  3. Marry a woman and be faithful to her until death/divorce do you part.
  4. Marry a woman and claim to be faithful but use deception to keep whores on the side.
The last option is the one we're dealing with now. Tiger betrayed his wife. Tiger's mistress betrayed him by leaking the voicemail. In 15 or so years Tiger's children will read on the internet about the time Tiger got caught cheating on their mother/his wife. It seems like a lot of people are getting hurt.


  1. I didn't know #1 was an option, and I am already married! DANG IT ! !

  2. WAIT! I didn't know the second half of #1 was an option. You can do that? Do women know this?

  3. I take issue with calling the other women whores. They certainly made some bad choices, but there is such a double standard around that word.

    Also, what about marry a man? Is this not Glorious Gay Days?!